"I'll strap my board to my back and hitch a ride in my wet-suit"

Tomorrow morning, like really early in the morning tomorrow morning, M and I are off to get some much needed vitamin D. I'm very excited about this trip. Scuba diving in warm water, no need for parkas and boots, tropical birds and animals in the wild that you would only see in the zoo up here and no ice for me to slip on. Another bonus is that Julie has graciously agreed to move in a stay with Zeus for the week. I cannot tell you how many trips I've fretted away worried that Zeus is lonely.

Beyond being a much needed dose of R&R, it will also be a great opportunity to test out the Philosophy Lavender Pound Cake. They claim that it makes for a great body wash, shampoo AND conditioner, so M and I are going to take this, and only this for hair and soap needs. Should be interesting and if it goes awry, you'll know why there are no photos of either of us in the pending vacation image gallery.

Today's sing-a-long song:"Soak Up The Sun" by Sheryl Crow

HRH

Last time for awhile, I swear

Chelsea protests likely to fall on deaf ears
Chelsea denies tunnel incident
Barcelona's 2-1 victory leaves a brooding Chelsea mute
Chelsea feels the blues
Mourinho 'kicked' in tunnel row as Chelsea Frisked
UEFA puzzled by Chelsea gripe
Chelsea Frisked but Still in the Hunt

HRH

Too easily attached

Chris and Tash have safely returned from Africa. They came by this evening to regale us with stories of crazy Nirobian driving, the perils of climbing Mt. Kilimanjaro and so many cool animals. It sounds as though they had an amazing time, which is exactly what I'd hoped for them. I'm looking forward to the 6th of March, when Mike, Dawn, Tash, Chris, M and I will all be in the same city after our 5 weeks of respective jet setting. There will be many photos shared, stories told and the word "Dude!" exclaimed repeatedly.

So multiple yays for my dear friends having had a great adventure in the cradle of life, my dear friends living it up in Sin City and to M and I and our appointment with sandy beaches and flamingos. There is only one nay to speak of, since my back is recovering well, no cracked ribs, just bruising, and that is with Chris back, we have had to give Luna back to her rightful owner.

It's funny. We started this whole thing with a little trepidation. Would she adjust; would Zeus be irrecoverably traumatized by another feline in the house; would we get any sleep? Yes, no and yes. The one thing we hadn't anticipated was totally falling for little Miss Luna. Two grey kittys in the house was pretty great. She and M really bonded and I confess I got awfully used to having her under foot. Of course she's happier now that she's home with her owner, but I now know what my Mum goes through when I take Zeus back after she's spent time kitty-sitting.

Today's sing-a-long song: "Every time you go away" by Paul Young

HRH

I've fallen and I can't get up

I'm working from home today. I wasn't meant to be working from home today, but a fall on my front steps has kept me home to recouperate. I slipped on some ice on our steps. I caught one of the steps on my back, just below my shoulder blades (where the bra clasps connect), got the wind knocked out of me and am in some pain right now. I've never had the wind knocked out of me before, so that was rather terrifying. It doesn't seem that I've cracked any ribs, but have just brusied the muscles around them. Really the Advil can kick in any time now.

I think I'm the most shaken by having the wind knocked out of me. I know it happens to people every day, but it's really, really scary when you don't know what's happening. I was just spwraled on my front walkway, cars driving by, trying to breathe and making this scary wheezing noise. I was laying there trying to breathe and all I could think of was "I'm dying. I'm going to die. I have punctured a lung and I am bleeding out. When they do my autopsy the coroner will describe it as trauma to the back, causing a punture in the lung. She then exanguinated." I watch altogther too much CSI.

I must have looked really terrifed because some city road workers pulled over and came up to see if I was okay and they were about to call me an ambulance when I started to regain the use of my lungs. They talked me through it and helped me calm down a bit and helped me back into the house. There are some very nice people in the world.

When you think about what's happening, how a hit to your solar plexus will breifly paralyze your diaphragm, you have to wonder why your body would have a reaciton like that? I have a new respect for football players.

Today's sing-a-long song: "Thoughts of a Dying Atheist" by Muse

HRH

Ebony and Ivory, live together in perfect harmony...

Zeus and Luna on in the same room, on different couches, at the same time. Oh for a wide angle lens.



HRH

Got nothing to do today

It's cold and windy outside. Trust me, I know. Stay inside and drive yourself insane with this little game:

http://www.foon.co.uk/farcade/hapland/

Today's sing-a-long song: "Foolish Games" by Jewel

HRH

It's 4:30 on Friday afternoon, you know you need this

I'm generally a good person, but I'm not above mocking these album covers. Happy weekend everyone.

Today's sing-a-long song: "Heresy" by Nine Inch Nails

HRH

Hot rock on rock action

Mike's curling team was short a body yesterday and I took the call to sub in, found myself a broom, taped my shoe and embraced a new sport. It was my first outing at the curling club and I think I can safely say that it was a decent first run. I didn't slip on the ice, I didn't injure another person and I think I managed to throw a couple of good rocks. I had a great time and I totally understand how addictive the game can be. I haven't mastered the whole "curling" part of the sport, as my rocks have way too much spin on them, but I think there's promise.

Or at least there was promise until the game finished and I checked on my right knee. It's not like it's breaking news or anything, but I'm really dumb. I will play through pain. I shouldn't do this, but I will, especially if I'm enjoying what I'm doing. And I was really enjoying yesterday. I miss sports and games so much and being smart and not getting hurt is just so, so boring.

I thought things were on the up and up joint wise. I've been at the gym pretty consistently without an excessive amount of pain. There are good days and bad days and the cold never seems to help. In this case it seems that my novice technique of letting my right knee hit the ice each time I push off and the motion I use to propel me down the ice while sweeping have some consequences and discoveries.

The most exciting of these discoveries is that beyond bruising and stiffness, I now have knowledge of swelling. This is new and exciting.

Today's sing-a-long song: "Rock you" by Helix

HRH

Cacophony of Cats

Luna has about a week left here at Casa M and Chel and she's settled in so well that there may be some separation anxiety when Chris tries to take her home. He doesn't really need her, does he? A loud "Yes I do" wafts across the Atlantic in reply and a "Say what? from Zeus:



She's so well-adjusted she's become a lap cat. See:



Zeus has also adjusted to Luna's company. He can be heard following her about the house, telling her just how things are (no hissing, no growling, just a lot of talking) and until we made it off limits, he had taken to sleeping in her carrier. I guess it is true that someone else's stuff is always better:



Two cats has been pretty cool. Zeus has been more playful since Luna's arrival and I'd forgotten how charming (and sometimes really irritating) it can be to have a cat cutting you off as you walk. Even the cat toys are getting a workout:



I don't want to mislead anyone into thinking that it's all cat peace all the time here. Luna still has to tread carefully (The perspective in this photo makes her look bigger than she is):



Still I am determined to get a good shot of the two of them before she is on her way home, now matter how much of my own blood is spilled. And when she does return to Casa Chris, she will most definitely have to take her new best friend, Mr. Fish with her:



Today's sing-a-long song: "Photograph" by Def Leppard

HRH

Opting out

I'm sure most people are writing lovey-dovey Valentine's Day posts today, so if you're looking for a "Oh how I love thee, my significant other! Oh aren't we just the epitomy of love! We have matching shoes!" kind of post, look elsewhere. I don't do Valentine's Day. M doesn't do Valentine's Day. I lavish affection upon my man on my terms, not Hallmark's.

Seriously, who celebrates love with a massacre?(unless of course the massacre you're talking about is my teenage dating history. Ha!)

Today's sing-a-long song: "More than this" by Roxy Music

HRH

Denial

It's not snowing. I just thought I should let you all know that. I know that it's just the beginning of February, but I'm declaring it spring. Not that declaring anything will make the snow stop. It seems that all I can do is pretend that it's spring time in my kitchen. If you just focus on the tulips, you can almost forget the biting cold.







Today's sing-a-long song: "Another Spring" by Nina Simone

HRH

Revelations

1. I have a new love. It is called CLR Kitchen and Bathroom cleaner. You should see the floor in the shower. Like seriously. Between that and the Mr. Clean Magic Eraser I'm a happy little cleaning bee. Tip: If you're going to be a crazy person and use the Magic Eraser on your kitchen floor, buy knee pads.

2. Oatmeal is very filling.

3. I miss hockey. Miguel and I watched the Superbowl last night, which we both found so engaging that he did some numbers for work and I organized photos, sketched and sifted through the Lee Valley catalouge. Not exactly engrossing. Hockey come back.

4. Matt Blair is a smokin' DJ. I've known Matty for about eight years, and aside from Mike & Dawn's wedding (which was top shelf music choice, it doesn't really count as a DJ set) I've never seen him spin. And hot diggity damn, he's great. If the Elmo hadn't been so absolutely freezing, I'm sure I would have abondoned my pursuit of wrapping as much of my flesh as possible around a table candle to get up and shake a little booty. Perhaps I'll bring a parka next time.

Edit: Matt Blair is also the featured interview on Torontoist this week. I didn't even know there was a Torontoist (companion to the well read Gothamist), and imagine my shock to find it today and see Matty's mug looking back at me from the page. Mad stuff.

5. itunes music store and my ipod, still wonderful. I am worried that I am totally overusing my ipod, since on an average day I use it for about 10 hours (and yes, I do have to charge it in the middle of the day). At least when it dies I know it will be from loving it to death.

6. M and I have given Luna a new name: Loonie. She's a sweet and affectionate cat, but just a little bit on the crazy side.

7. I would like it to be Friday. Can anyone arrange that for me?

Today's sing-a-long song "The Hokey Pokey" by Sharon, Lois & Bram

HRH

More wonderful headlines

Chelsea FC is now 11 points ahead of Arsenal in the Premireship, which means they're basically going to win the whole thing for the first time in 50 years. With this development, more headlines have come my way:

Cech is Chelsea hero
Mourinho says title-chasing Chelsea has to overcome dirty tricks...
Chelsea show naked ambition
Chelsea in complete control of Premiership
Can Dickov Sting Chelsea?
Cech saves the day for Chelsea

I promise I'll stop doing this soon.

HRH

This post isn't about anything

I decided to update the ol' Yahoo avatar, as they have created some more clothing and hair options. I don't actually own a hat like that, but I would like to one day. I've spent many days looking for the perfect hat in vain. Ahh the curse of the giant head. At least in the digital world I can pretend to wear hats.

The warmer weather has lightened my mood considerably. Just yesterday, walking back to work from an appointment I felt the sun on my face, I had Beyonce blasting on the ipod and I was wearing my boots of power (which are now very comfy and no longer evil). I felt just awesome. I had hope that spring would come again, that I might be my svelte self again one day soon and I was having a good hair day. Further affirming that this January was evil or as a colleague put it today "January is the new February" which I'm not entirely sure I understand, but I think February had a rep for being dull and miserable. One can only assume.

I'm liking February so far and I'm really looking forward to the end of it beacause I'm going to Bonaire for a week. In honour of my return to the tropics, I purchased a couple of bathing suits from Land's End. Why did I buy a bathing suit online? Because Land's End is the shit when it comes to suits for the long bodied. I bought this one and this one. I'm a fan of the one-piece, as both the bikini and the tankini can't really hold up to how active I am in the water and I'm always in the water to so some serious swimming or scuba diving. These are sporty but cute.

When the suits arrived in the mail yesterday I was slightly agahst at the size of them. They were big, like lots of fabric. But when I put them on, it was amazing. I was wearing a one-peice bathing suit that wasn't both pulling down my shoulders and running up between by butt cheeks at the same time. Of course they seemed big, because "normal" bathing suits are made for the wee torso-ed. To cover a long body, you need a lot of fabric. My dismay is gone because now I have bathing suits that are comfortable, that enable me to walk around without having to constantly pull them out of my ass and will let me be active, fun and hopefully a little less inhibited on my vacation. When your suit is too small, you are constantly reminded of how big you are and that can make a girl grumpy and absolutely no fun.

And being no fun is just so January.

Today's sing-a-long song: "Good to be alive" by DJ Rap

HRH